Wednesday, April 18, 2007


Sometimes, it feels like 95% of my day revolves around something boob-related.

If I'm not nursing Baby B (which takes up most of the boob time), then I'm using the breastpump to express milk. Or washing bottles. Or washing pump accessories. Or pouring my expressed milk into bags to freeze. Or organizing my frozen bags of milk to put in the garage freezer for long-term storage. Or washing my bras. Or desperately trying to find a shirt I own that actually fits my enlarged chest.

That being said, I'm very glad that I decided to give nursing a try and stuck it out through the difficult first week when it was painful because we were both learning how to do it. I wasn't sure I'd like it very much, and I didn't really "get" the bonding thing beforehand, but I understand it now.

And I love the fact that she has to rely on me for her nourishment...I don't know if it's the sense of power/authority I get from it, or if it's the instinctive desire to be nurturing to her, or something else, but it's very satisfying, even when it makes me tired and when it feels like I do little else during the day.

However, I don't think I'll ever be one of those moms who looks down on other moms for making the decision to formula-feed (obviously, since we give her one formula bottle a day, and I was a formula-fed baby and turned out fine) or preaches endlessly and judgmentally about the benefits of breastfeeding and how it's the only right thing to do, but my recommendation for friends who become parents in the future probably will be to at least give nursing a try and see how it goes. I'm afraid that if I had only formula-fed from the start, I'd always wonder how things could have been if I'd just tried nursing. It gives me a sense of calmness to know that I don't have to wonder that now.


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