Wednesday, May 02, 2007

HR stands for human resources heavily retarded

If anyone is looking for a job that requires no skill or competence, I have just the position in mind for you. I'll see if my company's HR department has any openings.

They have struck again.

Each month, we get an accruals report that tell us how much vacation time and sick time we've both accumulated and used. I received my report yesterday morning, and was surprised to find a vacation balance of NEGATIVE 10.5 hours. I looked closer and they had me using up 160 hours of vacation for part of my maternity leave, but I knew I didn't have quite that many (about 10 hours short, obviously), so I was stumped. I talked to our in-house HR person, and she told me what happened. She said that when the HR person at headquarters calculated my vacation hours available, she used the wrong rate to calculate.

Some background: We get two weeks of vacation for the first five years of employment, then at five years, we get three weeks. I started working there in August 2001, so I've been there for over 5 1/2 years, however, I was officially part time until they hired me full time in December 2002. (I was working full-time hours, just not receiving all the full-time perks.) So, according to my official start date, December 2002, I have not yet been there for five years, so I won't get my extra week of vacation until this coming December.

The headquarters HR dummy calculated my available vacation time based on that original date of employment...so she gave me too many hours. We've already received the paycheck for the pay period in question, so now I either owe them the money back for the vacation time that I hadn't yet earned, or I owe them the actual vacation time back. Hence the negative vacation balance. Our local HR woman suggested to the headquarters HR chick that was the better solution since she said HR had already screwed up some other things for me. Personally, I think it was completely their error and I shouldn't have to owe them either money or vacation time as compensation for all of the trouble and stress they've created through their errors, but anyone think that would actually happen? Not a chance.

So, until December, I earn vacation at a rate of about three hours per pay period. With a negative balance of more than ten hours, that means that it's going to be about seven weeks before I achieve a zero balance of vacation, and about five or so additional weeks until I've got enough vacation time to take one day off. It'll be about mid-July before I can take a day off. Now, I didn't have any vacation days planned before then, and I really can't take off in the next six to eight weeks anyway because this is our busy time of year, but it's just very discouraging to be left with a negative vacation balance as I return. I guess the flip side is that I received money for that vacation time, but I hate that I wasn't given a choice in the matter--and that it's because my HR screwed up AGAIN.

I think I know who I'm not going to be nominating for an employee of the year award.

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